I'm a cypher, wrapped in an enigma, smothered in secret sauce. Also, my name is Kev and I own this here website.
My affection for coffee has been discussed ad nauseum here on my blog. A quick search of the word “coffee” brings back 16 different blog posts. As a result, my #1 Dad coffee mug has received almost cult-like status. You crazy kids and your cults…
A few moments ago, while sipping some French Vanilla coffee goodness in my mug at 4 o’clock in the afternoon, two things dawned on me. One, my drinking coffee in the middle of the afternoon might have something to do with my insomnia problem. Two, I have never, despite using it every Monday through Friday for over two years, washed this coffee mug.
Before any of you report me to the FDA, allow me to clarify: I do thoroughly rinse out my coffee mug (almost) daily in hot water. I just don’t use any rags or brushes (or soap) to clean it.
Some might say that this is still unsanitary. I would argue that coffee’s abundant awesomeness purifies and cleans the mug better than any soap or brush ever could. And by not recklessly using soap, I am helping save the environment.
To those who might ridicule my practice, I ask: why do you hate the environment? What did it ever do to you? Rain on your wedding day is no reason to hate the environment, Alanis. It’s time to “go green.” It’s time to be nice to the environment. It’s time to stop cleaning your coffee mug.
If that doesn’t convince you, how about this? By not washing my coffee mug I have allowed it to remain in its original, pristine state. Imagine if Leonardo da Vinci cleaned the Mona Lisa with soap every day. For one thing, the constant cleaning would’ve meant Leonardo would have been too busy to write his movie script for the Da Vinci Code. Secondly, constant washing would have eventually resulted in the painting being ruined. If the Mona Lisa had been ruined and lost forever, society would have never been treated to Nat King Cole’s song of the same name. We also would have never had to endure that Julia Roberts movie from a few years back, but I guess that’s not such a bad thing.
Thanks to me, my coffee mug will still be around to be enjoyed by many generations to come. Thanks to me, someday, if he wants to, Nat King Cole can write a song about it, too.
Am I a hero? Probably. But I don’t like to brag about myself.
Humor-blogs is also filled with French vanilla goodness.
;-) 1.24.08 at 7:42 pm:
First things first. I can’t thank you enough for posting a picture of the mug of which you have spoken so highly! Wow! A glimpse into your awesome life!
Also being of the environmentally-friendly persuasion, I do not wash and usually do not rinse my tea mug. This way, I conserve not only soap but vast quantities of water as well.
;-) 1.28.08 at 9:49 am:
On a more important note, have you stolen this mug or are you really the world’s #1 Dad? Explain!
;-) 1.29.08 at 3:41 am:
Well, your mug IS very pretty.
;-) 1.29.08 at 3:46 pm:
No, you’re cool. It’s the same thing with cast iron skillets. You’re supposed to “cure” them by coating them in oil then heating them almost to the melting point. Then you’re not supposed to use soap to clean them. Your mug is “coffee cured,” and therefore you will never ever have to wash it ever.
;-) 1.31.08 at 12:46 pm:
The hot water should kill most of the germs that may be lurking about in the bottom of your coffee cup. And if it doesn’t… what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger, I always say. Plus, there’s nothing quite like french-vanilla coffee laced with bacteria. Mmm! My favorite. *** Congrats on becoming an uncle! As the oldest child, I still have a while to go before ever coming an aunt. I’m jealous.
RYC: Argh. I know. I’ve been such a bad blogger lately. I blame it on the rain. Haha. That was yet another bad 80s music reference for ya. I too use “insane in the brain/membrane” in everyday speech. Yet another example pointing to the fact that we are most likely the same person. It’s just getting scary now, isn’t it? *** You’re correct. I was frightened by the can of Diet Coke. I mean, come on, zero calories? That’s just alarming. *** I’ll put in a good word for you, but I’m not sure how much it’ll help. Out of the six college friends pictured in my xanga entry, two are married and three have boyfriends. That leaves only one left for you. Which one? I think you should guess. Ooh, that would be a fun game! Guess which of my college friends is single, and I really WILL put in a good word!
;-) 2.2.08 at 5:50 pm:
That’s why I never shower.
;-) 2.5.08 at 5:00 am:
I would put the mug on ebay it might be worth a fortune.
Best
;-) 3.19.08 at 11:21 am:
[...] have probably written about coffee more than any other topic here on my blog. On one hand, this fact is incredibly sad. On the other hand, it is a [...]