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I’m Batman
December 19, 2008
Blog
17

It is the last day before my long, glorious, 16-day Christmas vacation. And how am I spending it, you ask? Why, I’m consuming large quantities of caffeine! You see, I didn’t get to bed until almost 3:00 am last night.

What was I doing up so late? I’ll give you three choices as possibilities:

1. I’m Batman.

2. I’m dating a vampire.

3. I had to pick my dad up from from the airport shuttle.

Obviously, all three are plausible possibilities.

Regarding the first possibility, I do occasionally fight crime during my spare time. I once saw a bat in a cave one time, and it didn’t really phase me. Oh, and I own a batman suit.

Regarding the second possibility, I am a fan of Buffy the Vampire Slayer. And I like to eat onions, so my blood is very healthy. Also, I avoid the sun like the plague (have you seen what it’s done to George Hamilton?!), so it’s easy to see why a vampire could confuse me for one of their own.

However, I’m afraid I am going to shock most of you when I say neither of these possibilities is correct. No, I was up late last night because I had to pick up my dad from the airport shuttle. It’s not a high profile job, but — gosh darn it — someone has to do it.

So, anyway, I’m drinking lots of caffeine today. I’ve had Coke Zero, coffee, coffee grounds…anything I can get my hands on. It’s because I’m sleep deprived and wired with caffeine that I think I may have hallucinated earlier today.

My boss’s boss came by my office today and introduced me and my co-worker to either his daughter or his son’s girlfriend. I couldn’t remember which it was because my mind went blank.

After they left, I gathered myself and thought the following:

“It should be against the law for anyone to be that beautiful.”

And I have no doubt what was going through the girl’s mind as she walked away:

“Why did that pale guy with the Batman cape have coffee grounds all over his face?”

In unrelated news, I recently watched The Dark Night.

Awesome movie.

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