(Sorry for being MIA, everyone. I’ve been busy. When you’re incredibly awesome, you’re usually spread pretty thin. Everyone wants a piece.)

So, in the end, I picked House C.

What’s that, you say? There wasn’t a “C” option when I talked about the possible rentals I was considering last time?

You know, you’re right. I decided to pass on both houses I told you all about in my last blog post. I just wasn’t feeling it with either one of them. House A had carpet in the kitchen, a “master bath” barely big enough for an infant, and noisy neighbors. House B had landlords I liked, but I just wasn’t enamored with the place. The kitchen was small and the layout was odd.

So, I decided to keep looking.

And I did.

And then I found it.

House C. Also known as the house with the pool. Also known as the house with the “naked baby wallpaper.” I’ll get to that in a moment.

This place is in a great location for me. I have a short commute to work, I’m very close to my gym, and I’m very close to my family. The rent is the same as the other two homes I was considering. It’s larger than the other homes. It’s nicer than the other homes. It has a front porch and a screened-in porch — something neither of the other homes possessed. It has a bigger and nicer yard than the other homes. It has room for both my pool table and my dining table. It has hardwood floors in half the house.

And it has a pool.

I’ve never owned a pool and I’m going to have to learn how to maintain one, but I plan on using this thing quite a bit. Swimming is excellent exercise. Plus, Lord knows I could use a little sun. If I had fangs, I’m fairly certain people would mistake me for a vampire if I was walking around at night in a graveyard (as I often do).

There were only two tangible downsides. One, there are some stains on the bedroom carpets. Two, there is the aforementioned naked baby wallpaper. It’s located in the guest bathroom in the main hallway. The first time I saw the house, I somehow didn’t notice it. I looked at the flooring. I looked at the sink. I looked in the closet. I looked at the tub. I even looked at the ceiling. But somehow I overlooked the walls.

On my second viewing, I noticed the wallpaper. My reaction was obvious and twofold:

“How on earth did I miss this before? Was I blind? I think I’d remember if I was blind. Oh no, maybe I have amnesia!”

“What kind of sick person puts up wallpaper of naked babies?”

As inexplicable as the wallpaper was/is, it’s not enough for me to pass on the house.

So, I got it. I signed the lease. Half my stuff is already moved in.

The tricky part now is what to do about the wallpaper. If I owned this place, getting rid of it would be a no brainer. But I’m renting. I’m not a fan of putting money into a rental — except for things I can easily take with me when I move. So, the question is, “can I live with the naked baby wallpaper?”

On the one hand, it IS in the guest bathroom. I never have to look at it if I don’t want to.

Also, for my guests, the wallpaper would make an excellent conversation piece:

Guest: “Um, Kevin? Are those naked babies on your bathroom wall?”

Me: “Why yes. Yes it is. You should see the guest bedroom with the wallpaper of senior citizens. It’s very classy.”

Of course, on the other hand, keeping the place female friendly was a goal of mine when looking for a new place. I even wrote a blog post asking all of you for tips. I could be mistaken, but I don’t recall any of you suggesting I get a home with naked baby wallpaper in the bathroom.

So, what would a female guest think of it?

What say you, my dear readers?