I was going to write a satirical post about a young Keith Olbermann pitching a fit when, in grade school, his choice for hall monitor loses a class election, but my schedule lately has been too hectic for such a writing commitment.

(For those unaware, I am referencing Olbermann’s on-air meltdown yesterday where he attacked Senator-elect Scott Brown of Massachusetts, who was NOT, it’s fair to say, Olbermann’s preferred candidate.)

For full disclosure, I should state for the record that Olbermann’s political beliefs are the polar opposite of mine. If I’m black, he’s white. If I’m up, he’s down. If I’m the head of a donkey costume, he’s the tail.

But that’s not to say, up to this point, I have outright disliked Keith Olbermann. I’ve nothing-ed him. His beliefs and antics and how he chooses to relay said beliefs using said antics have had zero impact on my life. He’s basically been like Paris Hilton to me. Sure, I don’t doubt she does numerous things each day that would drive me up the wall, but if I just pretend she doesn’t exist there’s no harm done. She’s out there, doing her thing, and I’m here doing mine.

But then he goes and does something so inexplicable I have no choice except to acknowledge his existance.

Last night, Olbermann essentially pulled a Kanye West. Olbermann thought Martha Coakley should have won the Senate election. She didn’t. Kanye thought Beyonce should have won the MTV Music Award. She didn’t. And while Kanye chose to express his disagreement by getting up on stage and interrupting poor Taylor Swift’s acceptance speech, Olbermann chose to vent his frustration by going on MSNBC and whining like a little baby.

The term “sore loser” wasn’t merely invented for people like Keith Olbermann — it was invented for Keith Olbermann.

Hundreds or even thousands of years ago, a prophet came to a group of people and spoke of the words “sore” and “loser.” This prophet told them of a prophecy — the prophecy of the giant whining baby with glasses. He told them it was their destiny — their DESTINY! — to join forces so that one day, many years later, a term would exist for when this giant whining baby with glasses pitched his giant whining baby fit on television.

“What is ‘television?’”, one of the words asked the prophet.

“Shut up,” the prophet scolded.

(Side note: This is also how the term “shut up” came into being.)

I’m not really sure what was going through Olbermann’s giant baby head last night. He didn’t sway anyone’s viewpoints on Scott Brown. Those that didn’t like Brown before Olbermann’s whining rant didn’t like him after the rant. To those people, Olbermann was essentially preaching to the choir.

But to everyone else — a group likely LARGER than Olbermann’s choir considering the fact Brown won his election (in a decidedly liberal state, no less) — Olbermann comes off as a slimy, ranting, raving, vicious, mean-spirited bully who can’t stand it that “his candidate” didn’t win.

Maybe that’s what Olbermann was going for? You know, so that the prophecy could come true?

If so, kudos Keith. Kudos.