Yes, it’s day three of that live blogging thing I sometimes I do. Yesterday’s effort saw a whopping eight comments from readers! Granted, a few of those comments were from me, but since I’m my blog’s biggest fan that totally counts.

8:00 AM

The NFL Draft is tonight. For the non-sports fans in my readership (which is all of you, given my blogging history), the draft is the annual event where professional football teams pick players from collegiate teams.

Granted, I’m several years removed from college. And yes, I last played football when I was eleven years old. And, sure, football isn’t even my favorite sport (that would be baseball).

But still, I really hope the Pittsburgh Steelers draft me.

It might be the only way I ever get close enough to kick Ben Roethlisberger in the baby maker as hard as I can.

I want to live the dream.

12:05 PM

Today is Earth Day, a day created to inspire awareness and appreciation of the Earth’s environment.

Considering the “green” revolution that has been browbeating all of us for quite a while now, “Earth Day” is as redundant as a tall giant handing out free gifts at 2pm in the afternoon to anyone in close proximity.

Yes, I just went all Tautology on all of you.

1:01 PM

I’ve made the somewhat debatable decision to have oatmeal and yogurt for lunch today.

Oatmeal is usually a breakfast item. Yogurt is usually a snack. To eat them for lunch could have horrible consequences my anything-but-tiny brain cannot possibly comprehend! It could end civilization as we know it!!

And scene.

This short play entitled “Kev’s Dramatic Lunch Dilemma” has been brought to you by the good people at Quaker and Dannon.

2:40 PM

I need a haircut.

I’ve let my hair grow out a little bit, but I’ve grown tired of it. If the wind blows, my hair gets messed up. If I turn my head too quickly, my hair gets messed up. Hair cream helps keep it in place, but I want to tackle the source:

I’m thinking about cutting all my hair off.

No, I don’t mean all off. I don’t want to be bald. The only thing I want me and Bruce Willis to have in common is our hatred of Ashton Kutcher.

But I do want to get back to a hairstyle similar to the one I had back in 2006. You guys might be familiar with it: It’s featured in my SKOS profile picture.

3:23 PM

A British doctoral candidate, after studying them in a dry lake bed in Italy, believes that toad behavior may be an indicator of earthquakes.

Let’s see how many one-liners I can come up for this one in the next sixty seconds…

Ten bucks says the British guy licked a few of those toads before making his ‘earthquake’ claim.

That sounds like the lamest Disney movie of all time. Please tell me the toad turns into prince or princess after being kissed. At least give me that.

This must explain why I saw that one guy from California making out with a frog.

Some joke about Obama having a toad on his White House staff!!

Dang. I didn’t have enough time to really flesh out that last one.

4:52 PM

If zombies were real and a group of them attacked the building where I work, I wonder if they would fight over me?