The following is a guest post from Angi. You might remember her from one of the million comments she’s left at SKOS, or from the epic A 2,063 Word Interview with Angi. Or, maybe you saw her in the video for the Macarena. Be sure to check out her great blog, We Sleep for Dreaming.

As some of you may know, I work in the medical billing profession. It’s nothing exciting, really. My day consists of charges, deposits, calling insurance companies, sending appeals, sending out statements to patients…and fending off nasty phone calls and letters from those same patients who don’t feel they should have to pay their bills.

Case and point: This morning, I was doing a deposit for the pediatrics clinic that I am responsible for. Things were going as normal, I was having fun with the “clickclickclick whirrrrr clickclickclick whirrrrr” of my adding machine while totaling up the number of patient checks we had received in the mail. All of a sudden, a handwritten note on one of the statements caught my eye. It read as follows.

“Nice. How long have we been going to [pediatrics clinic]?? How much do we pay annually already? And then you threaten us with collections over a $45.60 balance?? Bad form.”

Let me clarify the situation at hand. When a patient has a balance with this clinic, we send them a statement once a month, reflecting the most current balance, until their account is paid off. After 60 days with no payment, we send them a letter informing them that we have attempted sending them statements, but have not received payment; and whether it is an error on their part or an error on our part, please send in payment as soon as possible.

After another 30 days, if we still have not received any payment at all, we will send another letter – but we also keep sending statements once a month. We also send 3 letters before we send a patient to collections. So, from the time the patient accrues that original balance on their account to the time they are sent to collections, they should have received 5 statements and 3 letters asking them to please pay their bill.

So, when this woman wrote her nice, friendly note on her bill, she had only received her second notice – which means she has received 4 statements and 2 letters. That’s SIX FORMS OF CORRESPONDENCE asking her to please take care of her bill (and it wasn’t even a large bill – I’ve sent out statements for literally hundreds of dollars before, so excuse me if I have no sympathy for her, having to pay all of $45.60).

I am used to nasty phone calls. I am used to nasty letters. What I will never get used to, however, is the entitlement so many people feel when it comes to their money. “How much do we pay annually already?” Excuse me? In what alternate universe is that a viable reason to not have to pay what you owe someone?

“How long have I been shopping at XYZ Grocery? I feel I should get my groceries for free today.”

“How many gallons of gas do I buy already for my Escalade? I feel I shouldn’t have to pay my gas bill this month.”

“How much shampoo have I used in my lifetime? I don’t feel I should have to give Target any money this time around.”

And then…when those people inevitably ignore their bills, hoping that the doctor/billing office/store/gas station will write off their balance…they end up getting sent to collections over measly balances owed, ruining their credit, and feeling like the world that is out to get them has, once again, been unjust.

What these people don’t know is, we behind the scenes have no sympathy. We laugh at you. If nothing else, you make our boring, mundane jobs a little more entertaining. Contrary to popular belief, nasty letters don’t make us shake in our swivel chairs or crumple into sobbing messes on our desks.

So. The moral of the story, kids? Pay your bills. Pay them on time. Don’t be idiots.

Humor-blogs owes Angi’s company $3.84, but is now afraid to write a nasty letter.